I’m sad

Honesty, self-denials, godliness, and many other words that belong to the normal life are losing their meanings in my book of life.
How is it that human gives them life and values?!
How would it be if those words belong to the man-created theories in order to hide his jealousy?!
If a man is married and also in love with many other ones, will he be called a traitor to the laws of attraction?!
How a soul can be strong to reason the shaking hands by the touch of an attractive stranger who asks for nothing but a velvet touch of unconsciousness!
Is there any saint to second Jesus on earth?
Even he himself might have been doing things that his disciples failed to detect in his life!
Sin is for humanity and there can be no prophet exempted in this case.
The ravishing sexuality appears as if different flowers that emit their own single scents; some thing that one can find no where but on earth and in the body language of sex. Even the same can be said about those men and women who may be destined to live and suffer from the name they have been carrying after a superficially formal ceremony of marriage.
The more life goes on, the more I lose my faith on marriage and even some times there comes a gap in my identity, the way that I used to look at the world, the way that I will become used to and the one who has to forget me by the by in her unwanted life of togetherness.
Metamorphosis is my situation in every day passage of life.
I’m sad... .

murky future

Feel as if motionless in deciding for the murky future to which I haven’t given a thought.
I can’t differ between what is good and what is not!
Making my mind for a new life, I hesitate and look back to those days of my first love, to which I still belong.
Then, unconsciously, tears roll down my face and wash a little bit of the best memories from this broken heart.
Though a long time has passed, she still dwells in my mind; nothing can change the reality and maybe it is the last time I am able to let my mind ponder about it.
Does a man have to pick up a mate for the rest of his life? Can’t life be the other way?
It is still unclear who this match might be but for sure this time there would be no loss on that for none of the sides.
No can break the promise or get kind of loose feet in the days of hard and joy.

to marry

Sounds hard when things become serious in the real world.
Friends are quite different in your eyes and you are not as much about as the same in theirs. I remember how one of my friends looked like when he was in his groom’s suits, the night he left his world of loneliness and started sharing the rest of his life with a lady.
I couldn’t say why he was dubious and uncertain in his face rather could feel the coldness of his temper when took him between my arms to exchange warm words of happiness in his night of marriage. Every body were having a merry night of love and happiness but he was pondering about one of his hardest decisions ever made in 32 years that he had lived until that night; I asked for the reasons and he replied with uncertainty about the future.
Now, they have been married for a year and my turn has come to make it for the future.
Having lost all my calmness, I play it by the ear and wait for the things to happen by themselves, to see what it would be in the days that no one knows his next steps to take.

Nothing Gold Can Stay

Nothing Gold Can Stay
by Robert Frost.


Nature's first green is gold,
Her hardest hue to hold.
Her early leaf's a flower;
But only so an hour.
Then leaf subsides to leaf.
So Eden sank to grief,
So dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay.