life in death and death in life

Is it important how we believe in God?
Images of God float before me and among all the isms and religions recorded on earth I’ve converted to a combination of all!
I have many friends in many religions, say Judaism, Christianity, Islam, Buddhism, and have seen as many among atheism and spiritualism. Once I was on a journey to Malaysia where I happened to visit a temple of Buddhists and also a cave dedicated to Hindus in the suburb of KL.
It was so much of great surprise to me to see the way they prayed to God! Free from this and that! Just speak with your heart’s language. It was of so beauty that I doubted in my previous beliefs. After a while I went through a kind of metamorphosis and became kind of a combination of all of them.
One might call it life in death and death in life. And I was thoroughly changed. I still believe in God but look at him from a different point of view that I used to in the past.
It’s not important how we believe in Him when we find the path a true one to him.
Kindness, peace, charity, humility and all those good wishes for humanity are the elements of a true religion.

WOW!

Having been moved by the way that friends happen to behave in their relations with me, I happen to ponder about the real place I might have in their eyes!
My ex-girlfriend still picks some of my brain on her relation with her new lover and in all of her words reminds me that she still loves the new fellow very much indeed! WOW! One other buddy calls me in days of need and when gets his job done, sets the mobile off and cares no fuck for the call I make on his mobile! Another gal falls in love and asks for closer relations but when I reply negative, she puts it down to my being a gay!
You know, there have been many reasons behind all those reactions and the big cause of them is me.
If my friends get fed up with me and if they come back to remind me of their love with better lovers, if they care not a penny for my times of need, for sure that must be a sign of my own faults.
Now that I have counted all those faults of mine, I would try to deal my friends wiser! What do you say about this?!